Four years ago today, my sister, Diana, died.
Since then I wrote a collection of essays on mourning in great part to deal with my grief. Yet, here I am still feeling the grief. It is not that I want it to go away. It is difficult to separate grief from affection, from missing a person.
On some level, mourning comforts. It tells me how much I loved her. How much I cared for her.
Grief is also, to me, about all the things I didn’t tell her, all the things we won’t get to do together. About how she will always be in my heart.
Carol Balawyder 
Thank you for stopping by
I wish you peace, love and comfort in every day of yours. May God heal your heart and soul
So sorry about your loss
Olga
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Thank you. I appreciate your kind wishes. Carol
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Thank you for your continued presence on my blog Carol. I have emailed you once more. Did you receive my email?
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No…I don’t know what the problem is.
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Okay, here are the questions:
1. What drew you to blogging?
2. How long have you been blogging?
3. Does your blog have a particular theme that you write about? Please share what this is.
4. Have you gained anything from blogging?
5. Do you have challenges in your life that blogging has assisted with? Please expand on your answer.
6. How often do you blog?
7. Where do you find inspiration for your posts?
8. Do you have a particular quote or mantra that you believe fits your life?
9. What draws you to other blogs?
10. Is there anything else you would like to share?
Since there doesn’t appear to be any issue with me receiving your emails (only sending them), if you would like to answer these and send them to me, I’ll get you on the list 🙂
Thanks Carol. 🙂
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Hi-
Hi Suz (is it Suz, Suzy, Suzi?)
Just to let you know that I sent you my answers on your blog. Hope it’s what you’re looking for.
Thanks again,
Carol
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Hi Carol, there is no obligation to respond to this but I hoped these thoughts from my experience of the loneliness of grief will speak to you.
Xxxx Diana
http://holisticwayfarer.com/2013/07/04/bereft-poetry-reborn/
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Beautiful tribute. I can imagine missing someone and grieving. Although I haven’t lost anyone yet (thank God), I do know this is inevitable. I also had a friend who faked a bunch of us out with a pretend suicide, but I was traumatized and grieved for him for real, til he came back. Agonizing. What I do remember is that I wasn’t getting over it. Simply continuing to live.
Maybe that’s all there is, for people we love are a part of us forever…
May she live in your heart, warming it certain days, for the love you have. 🙂
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Thank you for your kind and generous words. I am grateful for the positive energy which you bring to my blogging community.
Yes, people we love are part of us. As Donna Tartt said at the end of her marvelous novel The Goldfinch “…it is a glory and a privilege to love what Death doesn’t touch.” We never stop loving those who have died and we keep their memories in our hearts.
Thanks for reading and stopping by. 🙂
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You’re so welcome and love your response Carol. I wish I could print it. I know one day I’ll need it. We’re all human, doesn’t last forever.
However it absolutely is a “….glory and privilege to love what death doesn’t touch.”
Thanks for sharing yourself, and it was my pleasure to stop by. 🙂
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Oh…I was walking around your archives and when I came upon this it was as if I were punched in the belly. I can’t imagine this loss and I just want you to know that I have pure compassion for you. I don’t know why I ended up here…in this place…today….but I just wanted to send you love. ❤ ❤
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Lorrie, Thank you so very much for your love. It is difficult to understand the workings of the Universe. Trust is a kind friend. I hope that your just happening on this post brought you what you needed to hear today. <3.
I truly appreciate your visit and your generous compassion.
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Oh…Thank you Carol. I love what you said, “Trust is a kind friend.” Isn’t that the truth! I wish you a beautiful weekend full of love and peace ❤
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Hi Carol – I was going through your site and found this. It struck a nerve as I know the pain of losing a loved one and no matter how many years have passed, losing your best friend and family member is a terrible loss.
Grief is such a complicated emotion… you live a bit in a shadow of (like you said) what you didn’t say, what you know they’ll miss, what you can’t share with them now, emptiness… it leaves a pothole in your heart that you just learn to “drive” around until you just get used the new route. If that even makes sense.
I hope that your memories of her continue to keep you supported. I’m sure your sister is very proud of all you’ve achieved. Many blessings to you…
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You expressed grief so eloquently. I love the image “until you get used to the new route.”
Thank you for stopping by and for your kind and gentle comments.
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❤️
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Nothing I could say would express enough sympathy or provide solace for the loss of your dear sister. I have lost only grandparents, one parent and no siblings. I have lost students and my children’s friends too young to die. This is such a poignant post and may you have wonderful memories of your sister and no sadness now. Always in your heart and on your mind, Carol. Perfect tribute to a special and beautiful sister.
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Thank you, Robin. I so appreciate your kind words.
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Just stopped by since I think about my Dad I lost while he was 69. I still think about him on holidays, of course. Hope you are doing okay, Carol. Today is Christmas, so I will say a prayer for you and happy memories for your sister, Diana. ♡
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Thank you. Christmas is really a time to be with family whether physically or in our hearts. We never forget those we love. ❤
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